Tuesday, July 29, 2014

State of the Fashion Address 2014

The Filipino is worth dressing up for.

What a shame.

After sending three senators to "jail" recently for crimes against poverty, we all witnessed another flaunting of wealth by our dear politicians this time as they embarked on a fashion show amidst the State of the Nation Address of our also dear president.

Sure, let the usual problems our nation has been experiencing take a backseat and let's all focus on what's really important--what our beloved "public servants" are wearing.

 I don't recall Malacanang inviting anyone to any ball. Hmm...and we bet most politicians (and their wives) were all "Oh my! The State of the Nation Address is coming! What will I wear? What will I wear?!". And yes, in an annoying Kris Aquino voice.

Here are some observations on the event and some notable outfits that should have probably been traded for sacks of rice or outfits that would have been appropriate if every Filipino actually ate three meals a day:

Hey, look who graced the event with no fanfare and no escort (we all know where his knight in Panday armor his)?! Was this the back entrance? So both husband and wife are now doing back entrances (get it? since he's in jail and if he drops the soap...oh nevermind...)?

Imelda Marcos: Let me see how f*#cked up this country is after my family stole billions from the people...aaaaand maybe I'll see Kris cry.

Assunta De Rossi: The people only see me once a year. Better make this worth their while!

Assunta again made her 15 seconds of fame a year appearance.

Don't you guys miss her?

Wouldn't it be awesome if we see Cynthia Villar don a dress made out of the recycled materials that she has been championing in Las Pinas?

But that means work for her staff so maybe she'll just have it made again next year.

We also saw Lito Lapid rushing through the red carpet when he saw that there was a CNN camera crew about to interview him.

Some wished they'd worn pajamas.

Pia Cayetano was again stunning. 

In both her dresses (really, girls?! two dresses?!).

Oh, and then there was Heart Evangelista. That dress and that face and that everything was just perfect. Really makes you wonder why she's dating Herbert Bautista's younger brother. And why were they there, Hero is not a politician and...huh? What? Who? Ohhh...that was Chiz Escudero all along...(down boy...down boy...).

And wow, look at former sexy star Sheila Ysrael with her husband who can't say their family name properly (Dan Pernandez)! Has she aged beautifully. Wow. Just wow. Ferpect.

That Kris Aquino gown.

Was she channeling Katniss Everdeen from The Hunger Games?

Ironically, there ARE a lot of people dying from hunger in the country.

THAT should make her cry too.

Last but definitely not the least.

We would like to apologize to Princess Fiona of Shrek fame for being dragged into this senseless fashion extravagance called the State of the Nation Address.

C'mon, guys.

Stop this nonsense.

*Photos not mine.

Monday, July 21, 2014

Why I will make Manny Pacquiao the first pick in the upcoming PBA Draft

I used to like Manny Pacquiao.

This was before he ran for congress (I liked him even more actually when he lost the first time). I liked him when he was just a boxer. When he was a former kargador from General Santos City in Mindanao who made it big just by working hard at honing his boxing skills. When Pacman would lower the crime rate in the country just by beating up his opponent inside the boxing ring.

I liked him then.

Then his advisers took over his life.

But don't get me wrong. I still cheer for him when he is inside the boxing ring. Outside the ring is a different story though.

Here are some reasons why I would draft Manny Pacquiao number one in the upcoming Philippine Basketball Association rookie draft:

1. To  teach him a lesson.

That not everything in life can be bought by money. That we have to earn what we want and what we deserve (and I know he knows this already based on where he is now). That there are many less-privileged children who have dreams of also helping out their families by making it to the PBA. 

That, like him, these kids also dedicate their lives to be better basketball players and that these kids have hopes of bringing their respective little brothers and sisters out of poverty. Hopefully they don't get disillusioned and think that the PBA is now just for the privileged.

Also so the likes of Jason Castro and LA Tenorio (actually even a Pamboy Raymundo) can embarrass the Nike shoes out of him by breaking his ankles with a nasty cross-over. Maybe Mark Barroca can trade faces with him diving for a loose ball (though people would not really know the difference).

Maybe, just maybe, he will reconsider.

2. To teach the PBA a lesson.

We know that their number one priority is to earn money. For sure having Manny Pacquiao inside arenas will draw thousands of people to watch the games again. But is the PBA ready for true fans to stop watching and supporting the league?

Yes, Pacquiao trying his best to drive through the lane will surely be a spectacle but what happens when he gets body checked by Asi Taulava? Can you imagine Beau Belga posting up on "The Mexicutioner"? Although he can exchange elbows for rice, his face would be demolished if a Belga elbow hits him (insert video of the Marquez fight here). Maybe even worse than any of his cuts from boxing.

If Rep. Manny Pacquiao plays in the PBA, they will be a laughing stock in the basketball world. Yup, just like the Mick Pennisi flop. Or when The Living Legend Robert Jaworski ran and won a seat in the Senate. Okay, sorry about that. Or am I?

Are league officials willing to give up being the country's premier basketball league? If they were the now-defunct but almost-worked MBA (Metropolitan Basketball Association), then I would understand. Free Three!!!

But this is the PBA. This is what every young Filipino wanted to be (I think even Vice Ganda!) a part of. That is where we all wanted to be. The times we all imagined hitting that game winner in our own garages. That was the PBA Dream.

What a travesty this would be if this happened. Oh, yeah, this IS happening.

3. To teach KIA a lesson.

That not everything or everyone popular is good for business.

Let Globalport (owners of the first pick) draft Pacquiao. What would happen? KIA would do everything they can to get him. He is their head coach anyway, right? Unless he can play for one team then coach for another. That would be so awesome and amusing at the same time.

Offer two future first round picks for him? Maybe even offer money. The possibilities are endless. Your move, PBA. Your move.

Imagine trusting your brand (yes, not just the team) to an inexperienced basketball coach. Not a good move for the brand. But that's just me. He's Manny Pacquiao anyway. By all means.

4. To teach PBA fans a lesson.

Guys, seriously, we can't be happy about this. Think of all your sacrifices just to send your sons (and daughters) to all those basketball clinics. Then someone who does not (based on video footage and general knowledge) even have half the talent of your own son just come in and declare that he is joining the ranks of the most elite basketball players in the country just because he can afford to? That is just not right. Even bordering disrespectful especially to those who trained hard and sacrificed a lot just so they can play in the PBA.

Are you okay seeing our Pambansang Kamao embarrassed on national TV (actually, on international television! Hello, ESPN!)? Hasn't he embarrassed us enough with his singing? Manny, please don't do this to yourself and to your countrymen. But fine, if this is also YOUR dream, then go. That's why I will make you "The Number One Draft Pick for the 2015 PBA Draft."

I used to love the PBA. We'll see.

5. So there will be more Mommy D sightings.

Maybe she can do her voodoo antics on the referees or on the commissioner who allowed her son to be embarrassed and for everyone to see. Maybe she can also ask her son to retire. Maybe she can do a dance number during halftime.

Who here votes Mommy Dionisia to be the muse of KIA? I thought so.

That about sums that up.

If Manny withdraws from the draft, there's always Bobby.

Nalintikan na.